INSPIRED 2013 BELIEVE

 

I remember in 6th grade people in my own class would hear my name and say, "Who is that?".  I was a quiet one. I had my friends but they were already popular in plays, music, or singing. People seemed to know them more and all I wanted was for everyone to recognize me and see that I actually existed. I had a terrible time speaking out in class, raising my hand, or just talking in general. I was shy, I could spend a whole class period and not say a single word. You could say I had trouble with self confidence. I was afraid of failure, or in this case, embarrassment. I was a very good student, I didn't show it on the outside because I hated drawing attention to myself. I still struggle with taking compliments andr standing in front of people. Well, because I was so shy I learned not to take part in  activities, if I ever wanted to do something I would stop, think about it, then tell myself that I couldn't do it or that I would just ruin everyone else's fun.

Around 7th grade I realized that I wanted to change. I wanted to be sociable, I wanted my self-confidence back. My friends encouraged me to join the play, Mulan. It was fun and a good start. Besides that, being in EXCEL and learning to work with other people, to lead, and to stand up and volunteer myself for projects was probably the best thing that happened to me. I felt better about myself. I met some really awesome people and they all helped me learn how to be included. I still had a bad time speaking out in class, and showing the side of me that my friends knew. But my friends still had to push me, but sometimes that wasn't enough. "I can't make up my mind.","I need time to think it through", "What if.." These were all things I would say. I was the one bringing myself down, I tried and tried to get myself to do things but it is easier to say no than to commit to something you aren't sure about. I wanted to commit. I wanted to be confident in myself. Confident enough that I could do the things that challenged me; The things that said, "Hey you can't do this" then go and prove myself wrong!

Now I have joined club teams, tried new sports, joined theater, taken classes, helped out in projects, and even led some projects too. All I wanted to do was to be able to push myself, so I wouldn't need other people to do it for me. I still struggle with speaking out in class but, I BELIEVE I can overcome the things that make me turn back and second guess myself. 

Claire<3